Too many balloons and arrogant expressions

The last couple of days: plenty of twitter compatible expressions packaged in clever design on my Google Reader. Most often from this blog (picture). Me sitting with dry eyes nodding in between emails and interviews. Inside my head? Writing applications with clichés I want to poke holes in, as if they were balloons and I was an evil child. Too uninspired to find alternatives, too much in the office kind of mind for creativity. I try and fool myself that misspelling is a sign of creativity. Laziness is staring at me from her corner, shaking her head.

I ask my girlfriend to proof read a piece where I describe myself as a media nerd. She writes “I love it” in the comments. Just below a comment where she claims that I sound a bit arrogant. You can’t have the sweet without the sour I suppose. There goes another cliché.

I walk snow covered Stockholm streets just to find the perfect backpack. Drink cheap red wine, then more hours in front of the screen, more words swallowed and short glimpses of creativity. Longer rows of lights inside the office, I pretend that they reflect my brilliance. Someone is laughing at me. Might just be me. Slow moving stories about people and their work drift through my fingers. I only work with words. I wait for someone to tell me that words are also important. But in a sea of engineers those who wait are not brave, only foolish. In the last couple of days: too many balloons and arrogant expressions.

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